New Delhi, India (BBN)-Does your boyfriend call you a pest for picking up Facebook fights with all his friends, when they tag him in a mocking but harmless picture?
Do you control your subordinates because you think you own them?, reports The Times of India.
Well, chances are you need to get a life because you seemingly have traits of a control freak and lest you don't want to become a joke in the society, it's time to bring about a change.
We got in touch with a Delhi based psychologist, Ashima Pruthi to know what the term 'control freak' exactly means and this is what she had to say - "According to psychology, a control freak is an individual, who wants to dictate everything around him/her.
Control freaks are staunch perfectionists, who are continuously defending themselves against their vulnerabilities, in the belief that if they are not in total control of everything around them, things will fall apart," explained Ashima.
"These individuals manoeuvre and pester others to change, in order to avoid having to change themselves, and use power over others to get rid of their inner emptiness," added Ashima.
As per Dr Bappaditya Mondal, Psychiatrist, PocCare - Healthenablr, people with control freak tendencies have become a challenge for the modern society because they are seldom aware of their behaviour, instead they actually believe they are helping people with their 'constructive criticism' and doing things nobody is capable of doing.
Dr Bappaditya lists out 10 characteristics of individuals who are likely control freaks or borderline cases.
1.Control freaks think they will be happier if people around them change for better.
2. They force other individuals to behave in accordance to their rules.
3. Such individuals absolutely discard imperfection and want everything to fall into place.
4. They judge every individual as right or wrong and passive-aggressively withhold attention until people fall in line with their expectations.
5. They are constantly offering suggestion to better others and their deeds.
6. Control freaks are super righteous and always thinking of what others think about them.
7. These individuals indulge in what's called fear mongering or presenting worst-case scenarios to influence others to change their behaviour.
8. Anything vague or okay for a reply is not acceptable to such controlling individuals.
9. They love to speak on behalf of others and justify their actions.
10. They hate hearing 'No' for an answer.
This sort of controlling behaviour can be addressed by using therapy to unravel the source of the need for control.
The individual and therapist/psychologist have to work together to address the underlying fear, emotions, or stress, and develop coping strategies.
Increasing self-awareness can help a person get rid of the need for control.
WAYS TO AVOID BEING A CONTROL FREAK
1.Realise you are responsible for yourself and nobody else.
2.Be gentle with people.
3.Never try and change your values or behaviour and be realistic with the expectations you have from others.
4.Accept that certainty is the new certainty and the fact that not everything can be planned.
5.Change yourself and not others.
6.Stop blaming others for your unhappiness.
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